Worth the Wait

We found this stone with the saying: No Cross, No Crown inscribed on it.

 

Thank you to everyone who has been faithfully petitioning for my ministry.  I had some days of wondering if I would waste away as a correspondent between organizations. Forever doomed to try and coordinate the bosses schedules. But despite my occasional doubts I knew that Father had great things planned for this program that I am working on. Shine is a special program and the way we have melded it together with Wait Training really gets me excited to talk with teens. 

This now will be my report on how the trip went. Enjoy!

April 8-10, 2014 Shi Lin Number 4 Middle School Visit

Angela, Denise and Peter 

traveled to Shi Lin by a rented private car. In a local Shi Lin restaurant we met Mr. Cai (the vice principal) and two teachers. At this luncheon we explained the Shine School Program and discussed that our plan was to teach 45 minutes of the program regarding Worth, Choices, and Purpose. We notified them that we wanted to return to do the second 45 minute presentation on Healthy Relationships and Protecting Themselves. When they heard that there was two parts to the program and that the second part was regarding Healthy Relationships and how to protect themselves. They insisted on giving us adequate time to teach the whole program.

We were escorted to the school grounds and given one of the teacher’s old apartments to stay in during the duration of our time. The apartment had three bedrooms, a living room, a chinese style bathroom, and a kitchen. We were encouraged to stay on the grounds for our safety. We were invited to meet the two classes we would be teaching later Tuesday evening and so Peter went to one class and Denise went to the second class. For a half hour we introduced ourselves to these classes and then the classes as well as ourselves went to dinner at the school cafeteria. Then at 7:30-9pm we taught the entire Shine School program to these two classes-approximately 90-100 students. 

The next day, Wednesday, we ate breakfast and lunch at the school cafeteria and we taught 4 classes-two in the morning from 9-10:30am and two in the afternoon from 2:30-4pm. During one of these sessions the teachers did not stay for the whole program and afterward informed us that they left early because they were afraid the students would feel embarrassed to ask their questions if they were there. 

The atmosphere at this middle school was very welcoming but not overbearing. We never felt imposed or pressured to do or teach anything we didn’t want to do. The teachers and administration desired us to be there not to teach english but to help their students become all that they could be and help them realized the risks that the world has in it. They recognized the need as well as the importance of this program. The vice principal told us that he could see the immediate results of the program because when he had the students in his class after we had taught them the students in general were vastly more well behaved and kinder to one another. This gave us much pleasure. 

The administration took us out to dinner on Wednesday night and they were very polite and did not pressure us to drink too much. Our reserve seemed to effect the reserve of the administration. We were introduced to a principal and vice principal of a near by elementary school and then after dinner we proceeded to visit their school and see the campus. They invited us to come and teach their students. I told them that at this time we only had curriculum for middle school age.  But I said that we would love to return at some time in the future. Perhaps in conjunction with a teacher training via Dawen. We then returned back to the Number 4 Middle School campus for bed. 

Thursday, we taught two classes from 8:30-10am and then we had lunch with the vice principal’s family. In this situation there may be significant relationship building opportunity. Mr. Cai told Angela and Denise about how his daughter, age 21, returned from college suddenly and refusing to return due to reasons she wouldn’t share. Her personality seemed to be significantly changed and she began to buy dogs in the dozens. Her father was and is still very concerned for her but doesn’t know what to do. He would like it if we or some one from Dawen could come and help her.  

The other situation that Mr. Cai has asked for our help with is that they have a 15 year old young man who has been acting out in school, causing trouble and beating other students up and stealing their money. This young man’s father had died and his mother has remarried. The administration seems to believe that the home atmosphere is healthy but we were unable to talk to this young man because he did not come to school the next few days. 

We are trying to arrange for Trudy (from Dawen), Angela, and I returning to Shi Lin to spend some time with Mr and Mrs. Cai and helping them know how to help their daughter as well as teach some of the teachers on how to deal with unruly students and to spend some time with both this troubled boy and Mr. Cai’s daughter. 

All in all I feel greatly blessed by Father for his blessing with this school as well as for our contact in Mr. Li-who set all this up for us. 

We are awaiting Mr. Li’s return call to let us know if there is additional schools we could visit this month. We gave him dates for next week and the week after. Therefore, we will await his direction. 

June Newsletter

I have been very busy these past few months.  Productively busy. I have been told by two teachers and a principle that the work I am doing for them is very important. So I feel not only productive but appreciated. These feelings make my hectic-ness, my tiredness, my internal stress all worthwhile. I feel very alone despite all the busyness. 

But I am not alone. Sure, I am the one preparing for lessons, I am the one entering the data after each session, I am the one standing up there in front of students. But I have always had a team even before my “team” was put together.  My Team Leader is at work even when I cannot see it. 

We have been working on how to do followup with the students we teach. It is an on going question we discuss. I feel that through a series of guided events we are in the first stages of preparing a good followup system. This is an answer to my many petitions and many of your thoughts for me. I have been fretting about it because I finally have a contract and the contract says that the follow up program will be in place and ready to be implemented by August. I know that I am unexperienced and unskilled to do this. And I had expressed all these feelings to both sides of my team. Both the physical and spiritual teams. Everyone was on the same page. 

Enter the plans of my Team Leader. Last week, I was called in to substitute at an English Corner. I led an hour long English Corner with students who had already sat through my initial teaching. It was a blast and got me thinking. We as a team discussed the options and came up with a followup plan that we offer each school an English Corner program (6 sessions) that takes place after the initial teaching. Between now and the end of June we will be working on a curriculum for each English Corner session that corresponds to the  6 points of my teaching (1.value, 2. good decisions, 3.potential, 4. sex has physical consequences, 5. sex has emotional consequences, 6. the tricks traffickers use.) This idea would have never come to me on my own. Thank you, Team Leader. 

Today, I met with a woman who has been living here teaching English. She and I met to discuss her possible collaboration with the Shine School Program.  This all comes just a week after our first session of English Corner.  I am hoping that my Team Leader wants her to be a part of my team. I think her skills would be very helpful to our project. But whether or not she is going to be a part of my team or not I would like your thoughts and petitions for a team that works well together and that we can share the responsibilities of the job. 

I am so thankful for the team I have been given in You. For it truly is a team effort to follow the Team Leader. Thank you for your faithfulness both in financial ways as well as in lifting me up. 

December 12-14~Villages on Short Notice

So after the weekend of crazy Christmas-ness I woke on Monday with plans to meet with my team to debrief Friday. I also had plans to write my December 7th blog last Monday. Imagine my surprise to find that Father had different plans for me. 

On my way to my debrief on Monday I received a phone call from Eden's boss telling me that the headmaster from number 12 middle school had given a rave review to Mr. Lee and so Mr. Lee had arranged for me and our team to go to a village area on Wednesday December the 12th and stay there until the 14th.  At the moment of the phone call my heart jumped for joy and then the reality hit me that I had a day to prepare to go to the villages for three days.  The amazing thing is that one of the only details I was given regarding going to the village was that this was a opportunity to touch 3,000 young people.

I began to freak out that I needed to prepare so many things in only 1 day.  

Then I discovered that I didn't need to have everything put together, because no one in the villages and not even Mr. Lee himself knew what handouts I had to give to the youths. So, I calmed down and assessed the finances available to me and put together 600 handouts.  It was what I could do in the amount of time available and I told myself to not feel guilty about that. 

Wednesday, I went with Eden's boss, Lisa,  and Angela to meet Mr. Lee and Mr. Liang.  Lisa went inorder to tell Mr. Lee that in the future we need at least a week to prepare before going to implement the School program in a Village. However, in typical Mr. Lee fashion he did not show up. 

For you all at home.....for him to continually not show up when he keeps saying he will be there is not culturally rude. Very inconvenient for me and feels a little rude to me because I am not Chinese but here it is perfectly acceptable. 

So, we met Mr. Liang and we all went to tea for like EVER.....we talked and talked and talked. Or I should say he talked with Lisa. In Chinese culture your position is very important and he had assigned Lisa the leader of the project position because she was also a boss. He saw me as just a lower teacher and so literally he didn't say a single word to me for like 3 hours. It was a little disconcerting, because I knew that Lisa would not be going with us to the village. What was this trip going to look like? 

It didn't end up looking anything like I had imagined. Because when Mr. Liang learned that Lisa was not coming he was not very happy with us. He said that with only 1 American coming to the village the program would not be successful because the schools were expecting a team of Americans. Lisa was unable to join us due to her family obligations and so instead we called the Eden business manager and the non-profit intern and Janelle and Lesa came with us. 

At that same tea Mr. Liang told us he was excited for us to not only teach the students but also to train the teachers. Which was so exciting and encouraging. I mean,  to be invited to multiply this work already gave me hope.  This point was soon to revealed as a misunderstanding. His meaning was that he wanted us to spend time having English Corner with the teachers at each school. An English Corner for those of you at home-is a time when a native English speaker answers questions about their culture as well as encourages those who are not native English speakers to use their English more. 

Needless to say we eventually left the city for the rural area. I was given the task to tell Mr. Liang that I was indeed the leader of this project. In this process I learned a new Chinese phrase. Pei Ma Pi. 
This phrase literally means to pet the horse and the translation means to stroke someone's ego. This
kind of activity is very awkward for those of us from the west. We feel like we are lying. But in Asia it is second nature and expected. Let me tell you that by the end of the trip I hated to pei ma pi. 

We arrived in the first village just in time to have dinner with all the English teachers and the local government leaders. We went to bed that night in a hotel room owned by a Karaoke business. So we fell asleep to the obnoxious and boisterous sounds of those enthusiastic but non-musical singers.

The next day we started class at 8 AM. We were prepared and there were 200 students in my class. The only glitch was that when we started to show our trafficking prevention video the audio wouldn't work. If you want to see that video click here. So instead we had to narrate it on the fly. Which worked, but was a little disappointing.  Many of the students had very good questions afterward and gave me hope that the information really touched them.

Once the class was over I was given the opportunity to talk to the teachers. I thought that they wanted to learn how to teach this program and so I began to teach them about why it was important to tell students that they were valuable. When I broke for small discussion about this topic I was bombarded with questions ranging from What do we do about the disruptive students? to  What is the difference between American Education System and China's?  I was rather speechless. I did my best to answer the questions. Eventually Mr. Liang broke the teachers into three groups and had me talk with one and Janelle talk with one and Lesa talk with the third group. This was essentially English Corner. 

After having lunch with all the teachers and government officials again we traveled to a new village and new school. I told Mr. Liang that we would be glad to talk with the teachers but that it was important for them to sit through the entire program. He insinuated that communicating with the teachers was the most important part of this program and I told him that that was not true. Our purpose from Mr.Lee was to talk to the students about their personal value, moral sex education and trafficking prevention. So at the second school the teachers joined the students. I am unsure how many students we had during the second lesson but we almost ran out of handouts. So I estimate around 300. This time our video worked perfectly. This time after the students were finished and we had English Corner with the teachers one of the teachers asked me if I could help them because in the Chinese Education System there is no sex education and so what could they do. 

All really good questions but really not my expertise.  After this school we had dinner with this school's officials and teachers and then returned to our Musical Housing. On our way from village number two back to our hotel Mr. Liang proceeded to share with us some of his feelings about our program. I will just give you a brief over view for your sake as well as mine. 

He felt that because he was a party member and because he was introducing us to the schools that when we talked about sex we were causing the party to look bad. He realized that part of our mission was to help those kind of people the women who get pregnant without being married.  And the only true success of the program was the communication aspect with the teachers.  To be sure he was speaking in Chinese and I could not understand most of what he said but I could tell that his tone was one of censure and disapproval.  

Angela was quick to point out that if the students' parents will not talk to them about sex and neither will the schools then who will tell them. His response was Well this is China. (he only knows what that means) She also pointed out that we are trying to keep his students from becoming like those women who get pregnant without being married.  When we were back in our room at the Singing Hotel and Angela told me all that he said I was livid.  We discussed whether we should cut the second two points out on the morrow but decided that Mr. Lee had specifically asked us to put in the sex ed part and that we had already done that once and so I declared: Never Again.

That night I spent hours petitioning Father to change Mr. Liang's heart and open his eyes to see the value of this program exactly as it is as well as the importance of giving the students this information to keep them from making unwise choices. At times throughout my communication with Father I would grow angry again at Mr. Liang for his hard heart, selfish desires, and unwillingness to be flexible. But Father was quick to show me that I am too this way and was even more so before I was His child. I had to ask for Father to give me grace as well as to help me to hold fast to my purpose for being there. 

In the morning Mr. Liang's entire outlook had changed and truly it can only be by Father's grace that such a thing happened. He gave us two really good suggestions about the program. He suggested that we tell the students that my program has two parts and the the first part is how to Shine your life into the world and that the second part is about How to protect yourself. He suggested that between the two parts to ask for questions regarding the first half because he said that after the second half many students may not remember to ask their questions regarding the first half. So that is what we did at the third school.

Third school was my oldest audience. Some of the students were as old as 20. I am unsure if they were that old because they continually failed classes or because they had to skip school to help at home or for another reason but these students could more aptly relate to the sex education portion. One of the questions I was asked was: Can you get an infection from having a boyfriend. I replied that it depended if hold hands was the only thing you were doing with your boyfriend or not. I told them that if they were only holding hands then they were safe.  It is a mine field out there. :) 

After we had lunch with that school's teachers and officials we returned home. Toward the end I felt good but was so tired. On our way home we got to cross the highest bridge in all of Asia. Thus ends my story of the Villages on Short Notice.

 

Angela and I as we begin our class. 

 

 The room of 200 students from the first school.

Not sure what I am doing here.

This is part of the 100 kuai demonstration. Showing them that no matter what you do to a 100 kuai bill it is still worth 100 kuai.

When it is new it is 100 kuai.

When it has been scrunched up and looks gross it is still worth 100 kuai.

You are like this 100 kuai. No matter what has been done to you you are always valuable and your value doesn't change.

Does anyone want this 100 kuai?  Not a single child raised his or her hand and I used that by saying that even if no one seems to want you-you are still valuable. 

This is the gift/diamond demonstration.  We give one student a diamond inside a beautiful gift bag and a second student a diamond inside a trash bag and ask them which gift would they choose?

On the count of three they open their gifts and then turn around and show it to the other student.

We ask them who has the more valuable gift?

Then we talk about how their gifts' value is the same no matter what the outside looks like. We say you are like these diamonds no matter what you feel like on the outside you are not more valuable then someone else because you may be more beautiful. Or vice versus.

Then we say but unlike the diamonds that are identical you are an original. Like the Mono Lisa you too are valuable because you are unique. No one can copy you.

This is the Coke demonstration. One where we talk about how sometimes our feelings affect our choices and the fact that if we make choices in the midst of when our emotions are high those actions can hurt us or others. Just like when you shake a Coke up and then open it.

This is Iqbal Masih, who is our example of someone whose potential was limitless and is still at work in the world despite his death. If you want to learn more about him click here.

This is the oxytocin demonstration to show the students some of the emotional and physical effects of having sex with multiple partners.

Here I am giving my autograph to hundreds of youths.

Second School:

Third School: